BOOMERS BAROMETER AND STEVE URKEL

Marking is not one of Kurt’s strong points

I share a lot in common with Boomer Harvey, cat like reflexes, volatile, hungry for a goal and have rigged a club raffle so I win the major prize(although mine was Nutribullet not a car). We champions of the game are idolised by thousands of people whose lives are inadequate in every way compared to ours. The question needs to be asked, with Boomer Harvey playing his 400th game this weekend are he and acclaimed actor David Wenham the same person? Have you ever seen them together in the same room? Both rose to prominence in the mid 90’s and both have played the role of a diver.

Tense times for Boomer pre draft

It’s a massive effort racking up 400 games and solidifies his place in AFL folklore as a great of the game, all the praise and accolades that comes Boomers way is well deserved. I wish I had been shown the same respect when I played my 300th reserve grade game for the Chooks, there was no nickname on the Guernsey, no photo opportunity with other greats, not even a video montage of my greatest moments with Greenday’s “Time Of Our Lives” playing in the background. No, all I got was pathetic Crepe paper banner to run through, they couldn’t even get my name right, since when did I become “Welcome Back Ellie, Women’s Wheelchair Basketball Finalist”.

The Swans high priced back up ruckman Kurt Tippett played last week’s game without taking a single mark. To be fair to Kurt he misses this week with a broken hand, it’s safe to say the football was not responsible for the break. The Swans had a bad night against the Hawks and were down on their usual committed team football, more than once I heard throughout the game the phrase  “Barometer”. This buzz word is mainly used by lazy broadcasters who fixate on a term or word that is popular at the time and flog it like an unsupervised teenage boy. It saddens me that these “professionals” see the need for a catch phrase or gimmick, what next, BT channelling Steve Urkel every time he questions Richo’s intelligence we get a “did I do that?” You will never hear me stoop that low.

Wowee

ANZ stadium officially became the worst sporting stadium in Australia, if being stuck out in the western suburbs of Sydney or having a surface that Bronwyn Bishop’s pilot wouldn’t land a chopper on wasn’t bad enough, now we have steel bolts protruding out of cement. Luckily Jarryd Roughead only suffered a few scratches but what would have happened if the Swans big champ had suffered a season ending injury, luckily Toby is fine and the Nankervis show rolls on.

Campbell Brown exported his obnoxious bogan tendencies to another continent by taking selfies on the hallowed turf of Lords, not many people have the ability to make David Warner seem less of a dick as good ol Brown Dog. Campbell had told security that Warnie said it was ok, if only we all could use Shane Warne as an excuse for bad behaviour.

Its ok, I’m with Warnie

Carlton coach Jon Barker stated earlier in the week that Hawthorn were beatable, when asked how the Blues planned to do that? Barker replied, “Oh no, not by us, but someone will eventually knock them off.” Blues spearhead Liam Jones comes back into the side and if the Blues are to have a chance Jones must hit the scoreboard, he’s such a barometer for the team.

- The Lone Ruckman